Tuesday, January 19, 2010

The Declaration of the States of Steeples, Snot, and Poo

An Introductory Word

I suppose that it is not proper to stoop down to the level of the words that I'm about to use; however, I will not regret the use of them. Descriptive use of words such as steeples, snot, and poo are not the status quo when it comes to writing about life. If I were in preaching class, the only thing missing from this standard use of sermonology would be poo, simply because I did not high light the point with the S word, and I'm not talking swords.


Under normal circumstances you do not see the steeples of the church as a part of article writing; however, I have seen many steeples. The thing you need to know about steeples is that they mark the spot on denominational preferences. Steeples are large, skinny, tall, short, stacked with bells, as big as a 3 story buildings, and some with the looks of watch towers. Steeples are not indicative of selling points, I mean when Jesus died on the cross, I'm not sure that he thought it would mark the spot for heretical worship across the globe. I heard it once said that there are 38,000 different religions in the world today, and I can't help but to think that these are 38,000 different ways we've screwed it up. Religion defined is man's way to God.
I once saw a steeple standing on the stage at our college chapel that fit perfectly from the stage to the ceiling, it served as a lightning rod for a room full of students who were forced to spend three hours a week on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday clinging to the superficial words of a predetermined guest. I'm not mad at steeples or disgruntled by the worship that exist underneath the standing symbolism of a horrible death; however, I'm concerned for those whose white washed American lifestyles are classified by what church they attend. For the most part, individuals in the church are deeply needy, deeply narcissistic, and deeply entrenched in tradition because it is what they learned growing up.
Have you ever sat in the Sunday school classroom and heard the same dribble over and over again? It is because that same dribble was taught to the Sunday school teachers of today and there is no distinction made outside the box because of the fear that they too might cast a shadow of doubt in someone's heart. People who lead Sunday school classes are not stupid people; in fact, some of the smartest people I know are leading small group discussions every Sunday morning in our local steepled buildings. I do believe that there are amongst those smart people ignorance produced by ignorance, produced by ignorance, and etc., there is something to say in removing filters and searching the scripture and that in them we may find the words of life and not the words of a steeple chaser.


I find it interesting that we as American’s all deal with snot, yet we would rather not display our techniques in dealing with snot to others around us. Snot is found in every corner of the world it is not prejudice to a certain class of people, race, or society. Snot drips itself through the nasal passages of Presidents, Dictators, Governors, Mayors, Pastors, Priest, Deacon's, and the Pope (whom ever he may be at the time). Snot is blown in dish rags, toilet paper, handkerchiefs, tissues, paper towels, hand towels (the rough kind you find in bathrooms that leave your nose red and chaffed), bath towels, spit cups, and empty Dr. Pepper bottles. Snot can be found in places such as pillow cases, sink drains, couch clefts, bathroom walls, sidewalks, front yards, back yards, and underneath the table when you no other spot to wipe it.
Why even the topic of snot has been brought up in conversations over the world about its color, bright green, yellow, white, and red (depending on the type of infection you have received per its color.). A friend was telling me the other day about a lady whom he saw in the parking lot of the local grocery store who just exited the building walking towards her car who was left to blow snot from her nose into her hand and then proceeded to swipe it in the air to rid herself of this while loogie substance that was as he described, "disgusting! It looked like she was spider man as it flew from her wrist." What we need to know about snot is that it plays some kind of role in our lives and much like spiders is never more than three feet from us.
I tend to believe that Jesus at some point in His life blew a snot rocket or two and felt relief by having it removed from his nasal passage. Snot is not something that you debate in Systematic Theology as if it had something to do with you eternal salvation because it plays no part in you being seated in the heavenlies. Snot might as well be the topic of most sermons we hear today because like most sermons, snot is a topical discussion and has no eternal impact of the believer who longs for intimacy with their Creator.


Advancing on with the topic of poo, I must warn you that there is no explicit description of fecal matter and how it proceeds from or produces itself. Don't get me wrong, I believe that people have a right to poo because we all poo. The places we poo are sometimes problematic because the public has to witness the transaction. We shake hands with people that poo all the time, we just hope they had enough common sense to wash their hands before exiting the throne room. I worked on work staff in the summer of '91 at Lake Forest Ranch in Macon, MS and I experienced poo in many different areas of the camp.
I was summoned by the director to go and clean the rec hall bathroom that was occupied by the boys of the camp. This particular week of camp left us short of water due to a busted water line and in these particular toilets there was no way flush it down naturally with loads of water. He prepared me for such a task by telling me to suit up with goggles, cleaning gloves, an apron, a clothes pin, and a water hose. Just for future reference, when someone comes to you and says that you need goggles, cleaning gloves, an apron, a clothes pin, and a water hose, respectfully decline and save yourself a mental picture that will never cease.
As a means of gross, this top the list in every since of the word, backed with the support of my fellow work staff who participated from afar, I entered the bathroom and discovered a toilet that was not overflowing from milk and honey, but was overflowing from the remnants thereof. I noticed a message was written on the bathroom stall that nonetheless came from the crafted script of the index and middle fingers of a young gentle soul who decided it would be funny to write (_ _ it happens). After the laughter of disbelief and finding humor with the situation at hand, the bathroom itself was restored to clean order and I prayed that I would never again see the words (_ _ it happens) again on a bathroom wall with poo.
I am glad that in regards to poo, my sin included, disgust me. You may need to see your sins in regard to poo, as disgusting before you understand the need of a Savior who steps in and cleanses the bathroom stalls of your heart. I don’t have a perfect handle on how to help you see the disgust of sin; sometimes it takes stepping over the edge with the use of poo type language to describe the condition of our depraved lives.

Final Word

In retrospect, the declaration of steeples, snot, and poo have given us a look at humanity. We see things through filters that cloud truth and reality, removing those filters takes a process of wading through the waters that struggle against what we know as normal. Begin with one filter at a time and it will be easier to remove the mask we so easily hide behind on a daily basis. The results will be amazing when you look back on life and find that during this whole process that God never left your side.


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